Thursday, April 16, 2009

Three Types of People

Today I am taking a look at all the "comments" that were posted on the Burlington Free Press website in response to their article on Wednesday that I was planning on selling my shares.  I know what, mostly, to expect (or I think I do) because I read the Freeps online regularly and see the consistent postings of people I can only describe as miserable.  

The posts are there - so I will read them - not reading them doesn't make them go away.  So here we go...I may even post the "best" ones here...

-READING READING READING READING -

Well that didn't take long and you know what - Just the same as the past 6 plus years...I would hear many comments from people about how they didn't like the changes and then I would hear a few, like one for every 50, that expounded positively and at length about how much they loved the changes.  What I began to realize is that a majority of people simply feel uncomfortable with change.  Obviously not a ground breaking realization BUT an important distinction if you are working hard at something and your income depends on it's success.  Negativity, like positivity is contagious and viral...

Well, here's the thing:  It's clear to me now that there is a difference in the make-up, the emotional make-up, of the people who respond, both positively and negatively.  And that difference is consistent, I believe within each group.  For example, there are those that literally spit hatred at whomever will listen which is a reflection of the "change" that they "sense" and don't like.  Something is off to these people, they walk in to the club (in this case) and don't feel the familiarity and they don't like it.  They handle that "distress" by getting angry and expressing that anger.  The level of "distress" seems to be easily traceable to the level of un-familiarity they feel which is expressed in more vulgar or "offensive" ways...simply put...the more uncomfortable these people feel the more "obnoxious" their communications seem to be.  These people haven't advanced beyond, maybe, 6-8 years old psychologically.  They have no mechanisms in place other than to throw a "grown up" tantrum which, in today's whirled, is easily expressed in the form of blog posts (just one easy way).  My question is...since these types of people obviously didn't come from out of nowhere, what did they do for expression 10 years ago, or even 5 years ago before the onslaught and avalanche of all BLOG and COMMENT?Who knows.  I imagine these same types of people also have a difficult time in many other areas of their lives because they aren't able to process through what "change" means to them and, of course, humans are changing all the time or at least trying, so they find themselves in a position where they must feel powerless and at the mercy of all that is around them, conspiring against them?  At least that's what I think.

Then there are the people who really don't like, on the face, what we did, at first.  They are the ones who notice the changes and don't agree but whom also have been able to gain enough wisdom in the world that they understand, or at least are not in direct opposition to, change.  These people allow more data into their brain and bodies and end up seeing positive with negative.  These are the people who, after allowing information in, most likely saw what was going on at Nectar's and who became fans.  Or they may have continued to get info that it was different enough that they no longer enjoyed it or related with it in the same positive way and maybe they don't come anymore or as much.  These are not the people who spit vitriol, but generally give constructive, if not emotional, feedback.

Then there are those who simply love what the place is and what it means.  These may be people who never came to Nectar's before we bought it or they may be people who stopped coming and now have come back or people who stuck with it all along.  It was the feedback of these people that helped when night was darkest for me.  The thing about these people is they don't feel any need whatever to lament.  They are people who, most likely, are grateful for their lives and aren't relying on outside sources to "make" them happy.  These are the people Nectar's is for...these are the people who I have had in mind and will always have in mind as I go through the world.  These people don't give a lot of feedback because they don't need to, their feedback is the fact that they are patrons, they give feedback with their value (money).  They are traders of value...as I am.  Of course to balance this out there may also be the people who unequivocally hate what we have done with Nectar's and will never come back.  These people could be the same type of people but even if they are, they remain oceans apart from the people a couple paragraphs up, in that they are not the ones spitting vitriol either.  Whether they love it or hate, they aren't inhibited in their ability to communicate or in the lives in general and therefore they simply speak with their actions.  (for a note - "hate" is most likely not reflective of the truth here, a more accurate phrase might be...they don't see value anymore - hate is a word reserved for the people a few paragraphs up as well).

Where has this gone, where has it gone...

Well - to all those who have represented themselves, anonymously or otherwise, as "Haters", I say this:  Life is not so hard if you don't make it so hard.  And to all those in the middle, who, at least, are able to see both sides - even if it's difficult:  Keep up the fight, because it is a fight and you are on the right path.  To all the "value traders" out there - no matter what you think about Nectar's...I salute and encourage you to spread your motives; I do not have to tell you to "be strong" because you are strong.

Have a wonderful day.

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